Bittersweet

Another long absence from blogging, but that's life right now. Busy! This week life is going to get busier. I am scheduled to be induced tonight! Our little girl will be here before we know it. And I must say, I have never felt the mix of emotions before delivery that I am feeling right now. I am excited to meet our baby girl; though honestly? It's still very surreal that we are having another baby. I am excited to not be pregnant. Since moving to Colorado, I have basically either been pregnant or nursing. And we have lived here almost 2.5 years! But at this same time, this is it. We have our 4 kids. And we have had them closer together then we ever would have thought. So it's not as if I want to have more babies, but at the same time, to know that this phase of our life is over forever... it's sort of sad too.

When I look down at my stomach which is literally rolling with the constant movement of this baby- I am vastly aware that I am carrying a miracle. Being pregnant and giving birth is all a miracle- and for me, this is the last time I will experience it. Part of me is excited to move onto a new phase as a family, and part of me is full of sadness that this phase is already coming to an end. As long as I can remember, I have wanted to have babies. And I am so thankful that my dream came true and God has blessed us with 4 healthy pregnancies, and now wonderful children. I warned Luke a few days ago that I just may be emotional this week. So far, I have had held it together just fine. Through this whole pregnancy, I have really tried to cherish it. Even though it's probably been my most complicated pregnancy since I have been high risk. I have known that this is it- and I have wanted to really just enjoy it for what it was.

So if you happen to be up through the night tonight, say a prayer for me and Luke. We are supposed to check in at the hospital at 8PM. Pray that the delivery goes quickly and smoothly. Pray that our little girl will be born healthy and without any issues. Pray that the other kids will sleep well and behave for my parents. Silas and Eliana are over the moon with excitement to meet their baby sister- especially Eliana. Poor Levi has no idea that life is about to change; he will no longer be the baby. Pray that the adjustment will go well for him. I am so thankful that Luke has 12 days off work- this is the most time he has ever taken off when we have had a baby.

I will try to blog soon with an update on our sweet girl, and of course, pictures!